PORNAMENTS, an online novelty retailer specializing in – you guessed it – adult themed Christmas ornaments, is expanding their product line. After selling out quickly last holiday season, Pornaments has released 15 new ornaments including a well-endowed reindeer, a Santa that suffers from elephantiasis, and an ornament featuring the President of the United States receiving a colonoscopy from one of Santa's elves.
The ornaments encompass a wide range from your classic Christmas characters, such as gingerbread men, elves, snowmen, and reindeer locked in heated passion; to less risqué characters such as "Chim Chim Cher-Poo," an ornament featuring Santa Claus perched atop a suburban chimney, enjoying his morning bowel movement while reading the paper. Additionally, there is "Faded Frosty," a snowman who's had too much to drink, and "Ready Teddy," a cute stuffed teddy bear that has an affinity for sadomasochism.
After sitting on the proverbial shelf of adult online novelty retail obscurity, Pornaments is under new ownership, and they are changing the way that customers experience Christmas as we know it. "Our goal to rethink how traditional Christmas characters might behave after hours," says Peter Johnson, CEO.
Their sleek, direct-to-consumer via their website approach has struck a chord, and as a result, they've more than quadrupled their inventory gearing up for the 2020 holiday season.
"We were surprised to learn that adult-themed ornaments didn't really exist as a category," says Johnson. "We feel as though, culturally, America is ready for Pornaments. Especially considering the crazy year we've all had, we just want to give people a good laugh."
Where to order
Pornaments are available now at www.pornaments.com. Due to a limited inventory, once a particular ornament sells out, it will not be available again until the following year.
Keep in touch with Pornaments
Follow Pornaments on Instagram @po.rnaments and on Facebook, where you can check out their latest products, enjoy memes, and inquire directly with any questions you might have.
To get in touch with us directly, please visit our Contact Us page.